Renaissance Man Learns

Hello everyone,

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Thank you for joining me on this journey, and we'll see you on the new site soon.

I just wanted to make a quick post regarding MBOs or Most Benevolent Outcomes so I don't forget. In addition to my usual MBO for on my drive to work and back, for finding a convenient parking space (close to 9am when the lot is full), and others, I wanted to note an experience before my recent trip to Israel.

Being a bit concerned about making it through today's TSA security checks without problem, I did a MBO for making it through security easily. What happened is that I waited on the very long line heading into the international gate area at JFK, and when I got to the point where they verified your boarding pass, there were 2 lines. The one for the commoners like me traversed back and forth about 6 times, and the other for flight attendants went straight through. Well, just as the person ahead of me, and everyone ahead of her was directed into the maze, the gatekeeper closed off that path and let me be the first of the commoners to pass through the fast-path route through security. That was cool.

I just realized that for most of my life I've been 'into' meditation. And while I practiced alot of different techniques, it's taken me to this point of time when I finally got it, at least on demand, mostly.

Growing up, I read about meditation and I was strongly attracted to the subject, but without a teacher or any peers who had similar interests, or any internet where information was just a few keystrokes away - I was mostly on my own. Eventually when I came to St. Louis, and started playing with my new Nova Pro mind machine that I bought myself before graduation from my MSEE program, I started to achieve some deep states of conscious unconsciousness. I remember having a transcendent experience after a 45 minute "mind awake, body asleep" program while laying on my living room floor, listening to the sound of dual binaural beats soothe my consciousness into unity states. The best feeling usually comes right after the program finishes when your visual field gets filled with thousands of tiny green & blue dots against a black background. As the field diminished, what's left in it's place was all-knowingness. It can't really be explained, but I had a brief glimpse of what it felt like to know everything, to be connected to the universe, to be in the universe, to be. Amazing stuff. A cool side effect was that my body was asleep, for I couldn't life my arms or legs unless I tried really hard. For most I imagine it would be a scary experience to not be able to move, but for me it was quite fascinating.

Achieving these states without technology is a bit harder, at first. My next relatively easy meditation was more of a physical one that came out of my taiji experiences. I diligently practiced Qigong in class and out. Eventually when I started feeling the heat, the vibration, and the magnetic forces between my hands I was hooked. I've developed this talent to the point that I can move energy around my body at will, and have played with some of the ideas from Astral Dynamics like "splitting consciousness" where you can simultaneously feel 2 body parts, energetically. Neat stuff.

Anyway, I just realized that for the past couple of months I've been getting much better at calming my mind almost at will... dropping down into a state of unattachment from body and environment, just by moving my mind aside. I've also gotten good at finding the nothingness between breaths. Seemingly far out and esoteric, this stuff really works and it just takes alot of practice. Try to make a point to practice every time you feel bored, or instead of listening to the radio on the way to work - practice some simple awareness exercises, chant some sacred mantras (i.e. Om). Clear the mind instead of watching TV. There are many opportunities. Think of it as playing & experimenting and you'll do it often and eventually you'll move past the hurdles.

Lately I've been working on expanding my mind for the purpose of conscious creation. I like using the technique that is offered by Robert Shapiro who channels Zoosh (who I think brought this up, otherwise Speaks of Many Truths) - the technique of "Asking for a Most Benevolent Outcome".

I've been using it often, mostly on the way to work. Since I get into the office just on 9am, usually the most convenient spots in the lot are taken and I usually have to go to the garage instead. So, when I have more than 20 minutes to get to work (usually with more time in advance it works better), I ask for a 'most benevolent outcome for finding a spot close to the door, or a convenient spot'. What's cool is - it works most of the time and even better is that I now almost expect it to work, which should make it work even better.

Another thing I've done lately is taken responsibility for what happens in my life. My most recent example is that just before sleep last night I asked Spirit to let me process some of my karma while sleeping... so in my dreams someone accosted me with a gun and I tried to take the gun from them - I ended up getting shot in the dream and I felt this feeling that I never felt before. It was wierd. Anyway, when I joyfully woke up the next morning, I didn't automatically become a victim and complain about a scary dream - I owned it - took responsibility. I firmly believe that the more responsibility we take in life for everything good & bad that comes upon us, the more power we create for ourselves.

Another quick example: I spit my natural chewing gum out my window while parked, and when I entered the elevator in one of the buildings I stopped off in later that day, some gum got stuck to my shoe. Instant Karma. I created the situation.

At shabbat dinner the other night, a friend of mine was talking about the evil that existed in his sister's old house, and as he spoke more about it, we could both feel a chill coming up our spines. The house we were in started to take on a subtle energy that didn't feel quite right. Is it possible that the mere discussion of evil spirits from other locations, could summon them into almost any environment?

He then proceeded to tell me how he effectively banished them from the space, at least for a few days or weeks by calling outloud to every crack/crevice & area of open space where evil existed, and forced it do go away verbally, and by reciting the Shma at the top of his voice.

The moment he did this, the wierd energy feeling went away. Strange! Any comments?

The owner of a new-age store I walked into gave me a schedule of events. Now, being in a place that is not my home, away from my 'kids' (4 cats and 1 dog), my wife the one person that I know I can talk to about new-agy things, and in general, being somewhere where I tend to pick up alot of energy of people who don't want me around(I'm in sales thesedays) - It was nice to find a place where I can socialize with people of like mind. So, showed up this tuesday evening and was led to the back-room of the store where we all sat around a small table on folding chairs & couches staring at a pile of twinkies, chips ahoy, and other assorted goodies.

After some brief introductions, people started talking about various childhood problems, like how they had to suppress their visions because they were unacceptable in their family's households. Stories about young, invisible children playing around trees while at a funeral. There were some interesting stories about using tape players that record only background noise picking up strange voices that can only be heard if the tape speed was slowed down(while recording in a place of funky energy). I learned a little bit about the evil catacombs & tunnels of Portland,OR where this one guy had the ability to really know what certain sealed rooms were used for - very scary & evil stuff; hence, I learned where the term "shanghai'd" came from.

Then came more good stuff: All of us shared various experiences from 'cutting cords' with my mom which caused her to freak-out led to a few-months of psychiatric rehabilitation (ultimately a good thing), to anxiety attacks that alot of people felt, to seeing ghosts and apparitions on a daily experience, to theories of transcendentalism, to qigong, cleansing, scrying, and being careful with what you wish for.

I had a great time. Something new I learned about was the scrying topic: That it's normally ok to scry into a black mirror, but you should never scry into a silver mirror, for it opens portals to other dimensions, which may not be easily closed. Even protection may not be good enough since you may just be protecting yourself, but still letting spirits (both good/bad) into our world. Also, you may look into yourself and see sides of you that you're not ready too see - potentially scary stuff, or better- things that I'm not prepared to see. Actually, there was a day that I was staring into the bathroom mirror and I started to cry when I eventually saw an image of myself that I didn't recognize (It looked like me, but on a soul-level it felt empty... very wierd). Overall, a big message that this 'elder' named Melissa told me was that that I should be very careful with what I'm doing, for it can be very overwhelming when all of the doors are unlocked.

One additional tidbit that I found interesting was that when I was getting ready to leave, I walked outside and started talking to a guy who knew everyone but didn't hang out in back with us. It turned out that the guy used to be a warehouse manager and is presently a real-estate investment consultant. He's also 1/2 Jewish. So, we had a whole lot to talk about and I gained a bunch of new friends over the whole night.

Even though I can't wait to leave LA and be back home sometime soon, I will certainly miss the pagan socials. Maybe I'll start looking for similar events back at home.

Till next time...

A couple of weeks ago I was recommended to go to a park that resides at the top of a mountain somewhere in LA. I decided to go despite feeling a bit emotional about exploring some other part of town of which I was not familiar (which is rather ludicrous since all I do each and every day while I'm here is explore areas that are unfamiliar to me, and to make matters worse, I meet with people who generally don't want to see salespeople - the whole notion was just silly). Anyway, my gut told me to go, despite being fearful and so I went - It was totally worth it. The view was spectacular - of the entire valley,the air seemed a bit cleaner, and in general the energy felt pretty good up there! Arriving at the top, I noticed a tree to my left side, perched by itself atop a tiny hill. After parking and not leaving some money for the park ranger (I wasn't planning on staying long) I noticed that there was no easy way to get to that tree except by following a small trail, so I looked across the road and saw another region atop a mostly barren hill & decided to go over there, instead. Once I got up there, I noticed there were some lavender bushes around and decided to grab some leaves for my medicine bag. I'll go more into the medicine bag in another post if I hadn't mentioned it already(need to check). Anyway, in the bad I presently have some crystals, sage, & mugwort. I thought that the smell of lavendar would be a welcome addition since I carry it with me almost everywhere I go.

So, without thinking I took some leaves from the nearest plant and placed them in my bag. Soon after I felt a little guilty for not asking permission, so I apologized to the bush and asked for forgiveneenss. My attention then turned towards another lavender bush a few yards away and I decided to ask this bush for some leaves beforehand...

I mentally asked the bush, "Can I have some of your leaves?", and it responded in my head, "Why? For what purpose?".
I then answered, "For spiritual cleansing reasons" , and it answered, "Ok, but will you please remove the trash that resides underneath my limbs?".

At the time I didn't see anything, but as I moved closer and looked underneath, I noticed an empty Absolut vodka bottle that I quickly pocketed it so I can trash it on my way back to the car, and then I saw something a little more subtle - it was a ceramic bunny rabbit!

So I picked it up and flipped it around, checking it out. Strange I thought, especially when I turned it upside-down and found a bottle-cap on the bottom. I unscrewed it and pulled out a tiny dowel with 2 sheets of a long & thin piece of paper rolled around the stick. Upon unrolling it I found a whole bunch of entries in it, with some sort of circular green symbol on it that reminded me of GeoCaching. I'm going to have to check out the site and look it up. I didn't feel like writing anything at the time, and no pencil was available, so I put it away back into it's hiding spot.

Afterwards, I felt a little guilty for putting it back when the bush wanted to trash removed, but maybe that wasn't trash - maybe it's there to act as a beacon to bring explorers over to the bush and that is what it likes. Who knows?

Maybe I'll go back again and ask it.